


Just Keep Me In Your Arms Tonight

by minxaddie



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi Keiji-centric, Angst, Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Owl Bokuto Koutarou, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:21:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29600979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minxaddie/pseuds/minxaddie
Summary: In which, Koutarou wakes up to witness Keiji's panic attack in the middle of the night during nationals, and takes it upon himself to comfort the person he loves most.-"Keiji let the heaviness of his thoughts, and the day’s events float away from his mind, just cherishing the quietness of the night and the comfort of Koutarou’s arms around him before he replied.“Thank you, Bokuto-san.” Keiji snuggled closer into his captain’s embrace, wishing that he could save the moment forever."
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 5
Kudos: 29





	Just Keep Me In Your Arms Tonight

Keiji sits on the floor next his futon, knees tucked in and holding an owl shaped LED lamp in his hands. He shuffles the tiny light in his hands, trying to calm his thoughts and focus on his breathing. He was fine, nothing was wrong and everything was going to be okay. 

Except it wasn’t okay, he was panicking again, thoughts spiralling into that pit inside of him, chest heavy and hurting and he wonders how his anxiety got this far. 

It honestly didn’t make any sense, he was supposed to be happy and excited; just like everyone was. They were still a top contender for nationals, him and Koutarou were both proud of the work they’ve done as captains, with a team he loved and playing a sport he enjoyed. Keiji knew he should be happy, lively and excited. 

So why wasn’t he? Logically, it just didn’t make sense to him. Every calculated move, meticulous planning and scheduling should’ve ensured that he would enjoy his time with his teammates…and Koutarou. 

Keiji glanced at the futon next to him. Koutarou was splayed over the futon, blanket tossed aside in favour of Keiji’s, shirt twisted up his chest and he was snoring contently. Koutarou slept the way he lived his life, presence made known, demanding to be acknowledged and worming his way into Keiji’s life (and his blankets). 

He squished the lamp lightly, urging it to change colours and turned away from the rest of his team. It glowed green, then blue, then purple— and Keiji didn’t even notice the sheets ruffling next to him until a firm hand gripped his shirt. 

“Akaashi, are you okay?” Koutarou looked up at him, golden eyes twinkling as he rubbed away the sleep from them. 

Keiji nodded, not trusting himself to speak. His throat closed up and he closed his eyes, forcing himself to inhale deeply. 

“Akaashi…I don’t think you’re okay let’s go go go for a walk!” Koutarou rolled around in his futon, rustling through the blankets before pulling up his jersey and shoving it into Keiji’s arms. 

“Wear this so you won’t get cold.” Koutarou’s whispered, or tried to whisper. His whispering voice wasn’t really quiet, it was more raspy and bordered regular indoor speaking voice but Keiji was amused nonetheless. He relished in Koutarou’s predictability, the expressions that graced his face and the way. 

Koutarou pushed him lightly out of the room, not caring that the hallway light would probably wake up the rest of their teammates. Keiji walked out into the hallway before deciding to go down the stairs and out into the night, guided by clear skies and the glowing from the hostel’s lights. 

“I’m sorry I woke you up Bokuto-san… I couldn’t sleep,” Keiji glanced at Koutarou’s figure behind him, thrumming with energy despite being woken up in the middle of the night. 

Keiji clutched the little owl-shaped light and squished it, a nervous habit of his. Again, Keiji tried to rationalize that nothing was wrong and he didn’t need to rely on his nervous tendencies. It was just Koutarou being Koutarou and he wasn’t nervous or anxious…or so he tried to convince himself.  
He sat down on the curb, straightening his legs and looking out at the street, relishing in the quietness of the night, painted by the humming of the vending machines behind them and the sounds of the cars passing by. 

It was quiet, or as quiet as it could be with Koutarou sitting down beside him. 

Koutarou was an enigma, his presence unrelenting and despite not speaking he was still loud. His existence filled up the crevices of Keiji’s life, spreading his unyielding energy and happiness. Keiji let himself become distracted with Koutarou’s movements and the non-existent distance between them. 

“Akaashiiiii, YOU KEPT THIS? I was scared you thought it was dumb.” Koutarou clasped his hand around the light in his hands, calloused fingers radiating heat around Keiji’s. 

Keiji sighed before replying. 

“Of course, Bokuto-san, it was a gift from you. I treasure it very much.” 

“AKAASHIII, that’s cute, its a perfect little owl for my tiny little owl.” Keiji’s cheeks heated. 

“Bokuto-san, I am not little, nor am I an owl, and you’re only a little bit taller than me.” 

“But, Akaashiiii, OF COURSE YOU’RE AN OWL, ‘m an owl and you’re my vice captain of course you’re an owl too!” Koutarou rambled on, suddenly distracted by describing how him and Akaashi were both owls, what type of owls they were and what type of owls the rest of the team are. Keiji nodded along, thoughts drifting back to his performance earlier in the day. 

It wasn’t like him to be distracted, not by the other team, not by nationals, nor the immense pressure he put on himself. So why exactly was it different this time around? It wasn’t anything new, volleyball was still volleyball, his sets were calculated, he put in an immense amount of effort and yet, it didn’t feel right. His teammates were depending on him and he couldn’t afford to breakdown. He had to be okay, he had to perform and do well, they didn’t have any reserve setters and he had to give the third years their chance to succeed and do well. How could he do that when he couldn’t even stop the nerves he felt? 

He felt like such a failure. He couldn’t even do what was asked of him and he was supposed to be enjoying this trip, this tournament. And oh god, his homework, he forgot to finish it after his games, the readings piling up after weeks of being neglected and exhaustion, he suddenly felt a wave of panic rush through him, bile rising up in his throat at the thought of his academic performance suffering because of volleyball. Keiji didn’t know how it got this bad. Was it always this suffocating? Wasn’t it just fun last week? Weren’t his assignments enjoyable before? Why wasn’t volleyball a breath of fresh air? 

His chest hurt at the thought and it was getting harder to breathe. 

He was fine.  
He was fine.  
He was fine.  
Right? 

Keiji buried his face into his hands, trying to muffle the sobs wracking through him. 

“Akaashi? Akaashi! KEIJI” Koutarou wrapped his arms around Keiji’s shoulders, trying to do anything that would stop the sobs that wracked through him.  
“Bokuto-san I’m so sorry for messing up today—“ Keiji sniffled into the sleeve’s of Koutarou’s sweatshirt. His tears were hot on his face and he can feel his head pounding. He didn’t even realize that Koutarou practically engulfed his body at this point, hugging him tightly until Koutarou started drawing circles into his back and muttering as fast as he could to reassure Keiji that he did nothing wrong. 

“Akaashi,” Koutarou’s voice was tender, as quiet as he’s ever heard it. “I told you already, it wasn’t your fault! It’s okay to be nervous, hell everyone knows I’m the worst when it comes to games! I couldn’t even remember to do cross shots but, but you still tossed to me even when I didn’t deserve it.” Koutarou muttered. 

“And ‘sides, I told you already, you gotta stop overthinking that pretty little head of yours, you’re always tellin’ me we’re a team and I’m not alone so I’m reminding you right now! I’m here for you too!” Koutarou nodded to himself, coaxing Keiji out of his thoughts and his head. 

“I know, I know I get too much sometimes too, but Akaashi I wanna be here for you as much as you are for me.” Koutaro said earnestly. Keiji pulled Koutarou closer to him, relishing in the radiating body heat and letting himself listen to the steadiness of Koutarou’s heartbeat. 

Keiji let the heaviness of his thoughts, and the day’s events float away from his mind, just cherishing the quietness of the night and the comfort of Koutarou’s arms around him before he replied. 

“Thank you, Bokuto-san.” Keiji snuggled closer into his captain’s embrace, wishing that he could save the moment forever. 

“Anytime, and anything for you ‘Kaashi” Koutarou told him before kissing his head softly and humming Keiji to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> This really was a labour of love for me. I needed to get this out of my system and write some hurt/comfort bokuaka fic for my own mental health and sanity. If you stumble upon this work I hope you enjoyed it and stay tuned for part 2! 
> 
> **note I spelled 'labor' and 'color' 'labour' and 'colour' respectively because I'm Canadian and that's just how things are spelled properly.


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